Maybe I shouldn't be writing this blog post, but I'll blame it on the lack of sleep and the two salted caramel mocha's I downed in our local Starbucks.
Planning a wedding is hard. Like really really hard. You know why I know this? because I'm literally in the midst of planning my SECOND one...granted its a vow renewal, but still. I have never been so stressed out in my life and I swear if one more thing goes wrong I am going to go Madea on everyone and just burn the whole thing to the ground.
It started off great, I found the perfect dress, the perfect location, everything was falling into place just like I wanted.....then reality slapped me in the face while standing in alterations for the dress. Bless the little Chinese man who was talking a mile a minute telling me how beautiful I was and all that jazz, I even let it go when he told me my boobies were too small for the dress I chose. Then after everything had been tucked and made all pretty he dropped the bomb on me...The total cost was WAYYY over my budget. Needless to say he couldn't get those straight pins out fast enough. This was reality tapping me on the shoulder.
Then I had a few cancelations with some key people, because choosing the most popular month for weddings and thinking that vendors would be game for another one was not the smartest move on my part. So when they declined it sent me into a frenzy of eating ice cream and tacos to calm my nerves. I literally felt like my whole dream was unraveling at the seams and lord knows I can't sew-so I couldn't put it back together again. This was reality poking out my eye.
With these key people backing out other things were now left up in the air, like the rentals...which to me are pretty key elements. I don't like sitting on the ground & I certainly didn't want the cake to be eaten by ants. This was reality slapping me in the face. repeatedly.
So needless to say I am at sheer nervous breakdown at this point, ready to say byyyeeee and go hide under my covers while watching netflix. Then some sweet friends of mine reminded me of this: The ONLY thing that matters is Jon & I renewing our vows. It's not about the pretty, it's not about getting it published, it's not for anyone but us. We had such a rough start and this is our time to make it new. Why I am so concerned on making it perfect when all that matters is the two of us renewing our marriage that was broken and made better??
So let me tell you this sweet friends, if you are planning your wedding and things aren't going like you planned-the linens don't match, the weather isn't ideal, your bridesmaid dropped out....those things don't matter. What matters is the love that you are celebrating, the bond that you are making and the journey you are taking...together. All that matters are YOU + HIM, not the pretty flowers, not the pretty Vera Wang dress, not the lovely venue....it's just taking the leap of faith and creating a life story together. So when things go wrong, let it go. Remember your love for one another and hold unto it. THAT is what is important.